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2srooky:

One time in sixth grade I was being bullied really badly, and this whole circle of people gathered around me and the girl that was bullying me, and she smirked and went ‘You dumb rich bitch.’ And everyone was like OOOOOOH and I stood there for a second before pulling 20 dollars out of my wallet, placed it in her hand, and said “Buy some better insults.” And I swear the entire lunchroom rioted.

gayleaf:

you’re not allowed to wear a cotton t-shirt unless you’re a true fan! do you go to the fields and look at it? do you appreciate the agricultural implications of a gigantic cotton industry? do you understand the harvesting process? name 5 cotton harvesting machines. didn’t think so

detainable:

if you don’t get my jokes then we can’t be friends

jowji:

if you ever think about sending me an ask and decide not to cause “oh she doesn’t care” or “oh I don’t want to bother her” literally I’m the loneliest piece of shit you can find and would still love you if you sent me the word nuzzle over and over again

sophmoreslump:

"no one listens to fall out boy anymore"

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justalilblondemama:

Accidental personal injuries are absolutely the worst. “Oh, how did you do that?” “Well, frankly, I’m an idiot.”

rrrrosa:

those songs that start in one earbud and flow into the next

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